Til Death Do Us Part
What to Expect at the Marriage Intensive
There is nothing more beautiful than a godly marriage. But like the formation of diamonds, great marriages don’t just happen overnight. They are formed over time, often under significant pressure, as two sinners with significant differences come together under God and learn to live in harmony as one.
To have a successful marriage, we must embrace God’s design for marriage and lean into the process of becoming one. We have to be in tune with the various challenges and obstacles we face and learn how to navigate them in a godly way. And, we must invest time, exert effort, develop skills, and be willing to persevere, even in the hardest of moments and seasons.
The upcoming Marriage Intensive is designed to help each couple in this process of moving toward greater oneness. For engaged couples, this will be a great opportunity to take a panorama view of all major elements of marriage and to begin thinking about how you can build out a strong foundation for your marriage. For married couples who are struggling, this time together will give you the opportunity to reflect, reset, and begin taking steps forward to get your marriage back on track. And for married couples who are currently doing well and perhaps just in need of a minor tune-up, there will be plenty of material to encourage and challenge you as you seek to deepen your marriage relationship.
Over this special weekend, we will remind ourselves of God’s design for marriage, and take a fresh look at what marriage is and what it is not. We will explore primary reasons why marriages struggle (and sometimes fail), and offer sound biblical and practical guidance for how to overcome these challenges and prosper. We will consider how men and women are different, and what that means for marriage. We will examine “root problems” in marriage, identify “marriage busters,” and promote “marriage boosters.” And, we will share insights and best practices for strengthening marriages in the areas of communication, conflict resolution, intimacy, money management, child-rearing, extended family relations, stress management, and the like.
The general format of the weekend will be classroom style, with presentations, examples, and some Q&A for each topic. Most of the sessions will be combined sessions (men and women together), but we will do a men’s-only and women’s-only breakout session sometime on Saturday morning. Towards the end of our time on Saturday, we will do a panel discussion among some or all of our pastors and wives, providing an opportunity for some additional Q&A and sharing of best practices. At various times throughout the sessions, we will recommend books or other resources in certain subject areas for those who want to go deeper.
This weekend has the promise of being a turning point in your marriage, and we (your pastors and others) are praying to that end. But, like so many things, the degree of impact depends, in part, on you. With that in mind, I want to urge you to do three things between now and the Marriage Intensive:
I want you to pray daily for yourself and for your spouse (fiancé), asking God to do something special in your marriage through this upcoming event.
If you have access to your wedding vows (or a video of your wedding), I want you to sit down with your spouse sometime before May 15 and just revisit and reflect on those vows.
(For engaged couples, begin to think about what you want to communicate to your fiancé through your wedding vows.)
I want you to evaluate yourself as a husband / as a wife / as a fiancé and give yourself a “grade” on a scale of 1 to 10, with “1” being low and “10” being high. Give some thought to what you need to be focusing on to raise your grade, and make this a part of your daily prayer for yourself.
I am excited about this upcoming event! It is going to be a great time of information sharing, a great time of fellowship with lots of other couples, and it could be a turning point in your life and marriage.
Pastor David
