Why Do We Do Parent Commissioning?
Emphasis matters. We know this to be true in common rhetoric and speech. Emphasising the right syllables in a given word makes all the difference in being able to say it correctly. When we think about our children and the church traditions that we practise involving children we want to ensure that we have placed the emphasis in the right location.
More recently churches have begun to move away from a traditional baby dedication, which places the emphasis on the child and his/her birth – to placing the emphasis on the role of parents as primary disciple makers and the home as first-priority mission field.
Here are three reasons why Port City Church chooses to emphasis parent commissioning over baby dedication.
We believe that parents are the primary disciple makers.
Psalm 78:4 says, “We will not hide them from their children, but tell to the coming generation the glorious deeds of the Lord, and his might, and the wonders that he has done.” And many of us are familiar with Deuteronomy 6:6-7, “And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”
These and several other verses in the Bible are exhortations to parents (and the greater community of faith - see below) to fully embrace the role of teaching the gospel diligently to their children. The emphasis isn’t as much on the child’s birth as it is on the parents responsibility to disciple the child. Celebrating a child is a good and beautiful thing but what makes this distinctly Christian isn’t that a child is born but that there are parents who commit to disicpling this child in the fear of the Lord (Prov. 1:7).
We want parents to know that the church serves a valuable and helpful place in the discipleship journey of their child but it is an auxiliary one. The church takes a discipleship back-seat to the parents as we cheer, champion, resource, encourage, and equip parents for the work of the ministry (see Ephesians 4:12). As a church, parent commissioning is the beginning of an amazing and synergistic partnership where we as a church become a third-party presence as we affirm the role of parents to teach and model the gospel in their home.
We believe the home is one of the most strategic mission fields.
Our mission as a church is to help others encounter Jesus and follow his way. Honestly, it’s the basic thrust of every church's mission because it encapsulates what Jesus commanded of us before his ascension. In Matthew 28:19-20 we read, “Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
If you layer the passages from earlier (see Psalm 78 and Deuteronomy 6) with Jesus’ Great Commission you realise that the home becomes one of the most strategic mission fields that exist. Every week we end our services by telling our people that “you are sent out”. We do this intentionally and not haphazardly because we want people to catch the vision that wherever they go (university campus, cubical, medical clinic, AND their home) is a mission field.
Equally as important, though, we do parent commissioning to tangibly remind parents that we’re not sending you into that mission field alone… as your local church we’re going with you. In the book of Acts, when the church would send people out on mission they would physically lay hands on them as a confirmation of the calling that the Lord placed upon those individuals (see Acts 13). Just like when we send missionaries overseas to proclaim the gospel – parent commissioning involves the laying on of hands as a confirmation of the Lord’s calling to the mission field of their home.
We believe the entire church plays a part.
Lastly, we see the emphasis on parent commissioning as reinforcing one of the greatest encouragement to parents in their parenting endeavours. You are not alone. When you stand with your family in front of our church and see dozens of hands extended in your direction and hear people affirming their commitment to come alongside of you – it’s a pretty powerful thing. And that’s because God has orchestrated and designed His bride in such a way… to be a powerful and tangible demonstration of how He lovingly cares and provides for us in everything.
JD Greear has a great way of articulating this. He writes:
“[Parent commissionings are] more like weddings than baby dedications. As in a wedding, these people are standing in front of family, friends, and God, promising to fulfil the life-altering duties God has put in front of them. And together, our whole church gets to celebrate their declaration to raise their kids “in the training and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4 CSB). It’s an incredible commitment. We intend to remind them of that commitment regularly—as often as we remind them of God’s grace, which will provide the strength necessary to accomplish the task.”
We’re excited to celebrate our next parent commissioning on Sunday, October 27th. We hope you’ll be in prayer even now for these families and will join us that day to be a part of what God desires to do in and through the life and obedience of these parents.
